If you’re an international student like me, the transition of returning from winter break might have been hard for you. Adjusting to a new time zone, saying goodbye to your family and experiencing reverse culture shock both ways are some of the things that might sound all too familiar. As someone who attended boarding school for four years before college (I’ve been living in student dorms for seven years and counting), I am well-versed in traveling back and forth between two worlds — Hong Kong and California. I’ve learned how to live out of my suitcase, how to pack all of my belongings into boxes and how to live on memories alone when I am so far removed from certain parts of my identity.
If you can relate to any of this, here are some of my best tips:
- Pack as many Soju bottles as you can fit in your luggage. They will cost three times the price in your local liquor store.
- In the week before you depart for LA, eat as much local food as you can so that the taste of home lingers on your tongue for as long as possible. I, unapologetically, had dim sum (點心) for breakfast, lunch and dinner until I couldn’t stand the taste of siu mai (贖買) anymore.
- Once you arrive, drink lots of caffeine to beat jet lag, at least for the first few days. I can confirm that The Green Bean helped me get through the first week of school, even though it did not compare with the bubble tea (珍珠奶茶) back home.
- Don’t call your family immediately. Give yourself some time to breathe and newly adjust to your old environment. It will only make you feel homesick. Since I’m from Hong Kong, this also happens to be when Lunar New Year takes place. I knew if I called home I would only think about all the lion dances and red packets I was missing out on.
- Try to embrace the things that you love about your liberal arts college experience, like the gorgeous California weather, getting complimented instead of denigrated for your tattoos, being able to see a gynecologist without being slut-shamed, not worrying about hiding the scent of cigarettes and queerness from your parents, sparking conversations with random strangers, roads that are double the size, right-of-way pedestrian laws that keep you from being run over and having your art be taken seriously. You don’t get those things back home.
- Try not to think about the things that you miss, like efficient and reliable public transportation, cheap, good quality food, clubs and bars that stay open past 1 a.m., feeling wholly accepted because you and everyone around you share the same color skin, the comfort of wandering the city without the threat of a gunshot, the removed stress of calculating tips and your peace being protected by the fact that, outside of the United States, everyone minds their own business.
- As tempting as it is to hole up in your room and stay in your safe space, seize this opportunity (抓住机会) to spend time with your friends. They are your home away from home while you are studying abroad. It’s always the people that make a place what it is.
- Save certain jokes for your friends back home. Part of living in a new country is learning how to adapt to the social and political climate of the place. That being said, you’ll probably make mistakes. You might offend someone at first, and that’s okay.
- Remember to breathe. With cultural and language differences, extra tax forms, visa expiration and 60–90 days to find employment after graduation, it’s valid to feel overwhelmed. We’re all in this together, despite the curveballs U.S. Immigration tries to throw at us.
- Every international student goes through that moment where they realize that they don’t quite fit in with their friends back home anymore — where they realize how American they have become. Being international can broaden your horizons, but it can also be a deeply isolating experience. Nonetheless, you are not alone. If there’s anything that I’ve learned, no matter where you come from or where you’ve been, human beings always find ways to connect with each other.
Contact Michelle Teh at teh@oxy.edu