Author: Mariko Powers
Let’s be honest – most of us like a little sex. Ok, and maybe many of us want a little more action than we’d like to admit. However, there’s a fundamental difference between fantasizing about that cutie you’ve been coveting and feeling like you constantly need to either see or act out sexual experiences.
The latter is a daily reality for people deemed “sex addicts.” According to the Society for the Advancement of Sexual Health, three to five percent of Americans can be considered sex addicts.
This debate over “sex addiction” has been a steamy topic in both public and professional spheres, especially since celebrities such as David Duchovny, Jesse James and Tiger Woods have claimed to be sex addicts. But can someone really be addicted to sex? It’s not like drugs or alcohol – substances that alter brain structure after repeated use – on which a person can become chemically dependent. So the question is, can hypersexual activity really be considered a legitimate disorder?
Though The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, the current standard mental illness reference text, does not yet include a diagnosis for sexual addiction, the American Psychiatric Association has proposed that uncontrolled sexual compulsion be included in the next edition due in 2013.
Discussion on sex addiction is more than a little messy, as a consensus on what exactly defines a disorder remains controversial/elusive. Therapists describe repeated and uncontrolled sexual behavior – such as the need to have multiple orgasms a day through a fixation with pornography, multiple partners, etc. – as an addiction, a type of obsessive-compulsive disorder and a manifestation of other mental and emotional issues.
Whatever it’s called, I have no doubt that this kind of hypersexuality is indeed an affliction worthy of professional attention. The symptoms strongly correlate with those caused by eating disorders and shopping or gambling addictions. The behavioral obsession becomes so ingrained it disrupts one’s life. Addicts can’t stop even though they know it’s “hurting” them, even though they desperately want to quit.
While I believe that there is such a thing as a legitimate sex addiction, I also acknowledge that there will, of course, be skeptics. I think much of this doubt is a result of sensationalized media coverage, which further complicates feelings about sex addiction. It’s hard to look at the supposedly “sex-addicted” celebrity world, which is rife with sex scandals and multiple stints in rehab, and not scoff a little.
There are those like Eric Benet (Halle Berry’s ex) who checked himself into a sex rehab center but later denied having a sex addiction. Let’s also not forget to mention Tiger Woods and Jesse James (Sandra Bullock’s husband), who appear to be claiming that they are sex addicts to excuse themselves from infidelity in order to save their marriage and image. Because most people’s only exposure to the topic of sex addiction is through celebrities’ fickle and promiscuous behavior, it is easy to forget that sex addiction is a real problem faced by many individuals.
Jay Parker, a dependency counselor who runs a program for sex addicts called “No More Secrets,” holds that a person who continues their sexual activities even under threat of being “divorced, dead, fired or arrested,” is an addict. For me, these parameters certainly get at what constitutes problematic sexual behavior, but doesn’t quite cut it when it comes to what defines sex addiction.
To me, “divorced, dead, fired or arrested” are possible outcomes for someone who is wholly consumed by thoughts about and/or actions regarding sex – a real sex addict. However, just because someone risks divorce because they’re cheating on their spouse does not make them a sex addict. I prefer The American Heritage Stedman’s Medical Dictionary’s definition of addiction, which defines it as a “habitual psychological or physiological dependence on a substance or practice beyond one’s voluntary control.”
Those who don’t believe that sex addictions exist argue that psychologists are simply labeling everything as an illness these days, but the similarities between “sex addiction” and previously sanctioned addictions and disorders are too numerous to ignore. Just like alcoholics and drug addicts, true sex addicts relapse and struggle through months of rehabilitation. In a 1997 survey of 53 self-identified sex addicts in a 12-step rehab program, 94 percent reported that they had tried unsuccessfully to control their behavior, 98 percent claimed that they experienced three or more withdrawal symptoms and 92 percent said that they partook in more sexual activity than they wanted to.
“In addition, screening tests designed for sexually addicted individuals have also been shown to accurately identify people with substance abuse problems, implying that the disorders have similarities,” the L.A. Times reported in its March 1 article. “Sex addiction divides experts.”
Akin to how many alcoholics have a family history of use and troubled childhoods, or drug addicts who began their habits early in life, many sex addicts were sexually abused as children, witnessed traumatic sexual behavior or have had carnal obsessions since a young age. Like any substance addiction, most sex addicts use their behavior as an unhealthy emotional coping mechanism.
However, it is largely because of celebrity “sex addicts” like David Duchovny, Jesse James and Tiger Woods that hype about sex addiction has exploded in the first place. These cheating spouses definitely call into question the legitimacy of sex addiction, since they simply seem to be using it as an excuse for repeated infidelity. Regardless, however, of whether or not public figures like Woods bring the plausibility of sex addiction into question, people should recognize that there are many out there who sincerely struggle with this condition.
I may believe sex addiction is a serious mental condition on par with eating disorders and chronic substance abuse, but that doesn’t mean I think everyone who cheats on their partners or who may just be hornier than the next person is a sex addict. It just doesn’t seem plausible to me that Tiger could be the world’s greatest athlete, a celebrated public figure, endorsement figure head, and still be completely obsessed with sex.
Similar to junkies, people with genuine sex addictions come to hate their problem because it ruins their ability to function. They seek help because they want to learn how to live normally, not because they got busted for infidelity and need some PR rehabilitation.
Mariko Powers is an undeclared first-year. She can be reached at mpowers@oxy.edu.
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