First-years, welcome to college. We have been dropped into a completely new environment where everything is foreign to us, despite the countless tours we all did during Orientation week. We are scared, it’s the truth and one way or another, we all know it. Whether your fear is derived from the rigorous academics at Occidental, being away from your family for this long or making new friends, I implore all of us to stop acting so brave all the time. Having read many of these types of articles, I understand how they may seem disingenuous, but I too, am a freshman and understand how utterly terrifying and daunting college is. Experiencing college is horrifying, especially without the help of parents, family and friends. Nevertheless, my proposal to all of you, and myself, is to stop trying to hide the fear and instead live in it. I recognize this is not an easy task, but as the saying goes, the only way to deal with real fear is to run toward it, not away from it.
College, and Occidental in particular, is academically challenging but that is for a reason: they want us to leave here knowing more than when we came in. It’s no secret that college has different academic standards than high school does, and that is a big adjustment for new students. Nevertheless, we will get there. Patience is a skill long-learned, and while I’m sure many of you understand how frustrating it is being told to be patient with yourself, it remains true. Learning is something that we will continue to do for the rest of our lives, maybe in school and maybe outside as well. Learning to accept your mistakes and to be patient with yourself is something we should all put into practice.
Our amazing professors are here to help us and guide us into our lives, so communicate and ask questions when you don’t understand something. If you have trouble staying motivated, study with friends. Find what works for you. One of the many challenges we are experiencing is taking classes with upperclassmen and people who know more about the class topics than we do, which may lead to a feeling of extreme anxiety known as impostor syndrome.
According to Arizona State University, impostor syndrome is defined as “a psychological pattern of self-doubt among high achieving individuals;” the key words there are “high achieving.” If we are all intelligent enough to be accepted here, then we are smart enough to walk across the stage at graduation receiving a diploma with the words “Occidental College” written in orange and black letters. We should begin replacing the thoughts of impostor syndrome with some that are significantly more uplifting. Try this one on for size: instead of thinking “everyone around me is so much smarter than I am,” try “I can learn so much from my new classmates and I will.”
Last, but not least, there is the lovely little piece of our brains that dreads any form of change, including making new friends. I’m not going to tell you that you will find your best friend for life in college, but you might. I’m not going to tell you that you have to be friends with every single person you meet, because you don’t. I am going to tell you what I have learned from being here for the past two weeks: be yourself, and that probably has and will continue to be the most repeated message you have ever heard.
Occidental is our new world, and new worlds are full of endless possibilities and amazing people (all of you). While it might seem impossible, we will all find friends who like us for us. So as I always say, don’t dim your light for anyone, because we would rather live with a flashlight than in darkness. The most terrifying thing I have ever learned is to trust myself, and it is the most important lesson you can learn. We must trust that we will find people who will help lift us up and become the best version of ourselves.
The freshman class is experiencing the terror of college together, and managing all the horrifying challenges such as taking on a new course load, making new friends, meeting new people and negating imposter syndrome may seem impossible. But we can do this. High School Musical was right: “we’re all in this together.” So when we do band together (and maybe learn and choreograph some amazing dances along the way), we will be able to brave the world that is Occidental College and we will do great things.
Contact Arlo Gallati at gallati@oxy.edu
